Sometimes I feel guilty. I really love what I do and it is so much fun that it can't be right. Or can it? I often wonder what kind of work a person would be creating if they didn't like doing what they were doing. Say for example you had to go for some kind of surgery. Not something we take too lightly, is it? Wouldn't you want a surgeon who deeply loved what he or she did for a living? Someone who felt a deep passionate connection with their work. Someone who woke up in the morning and was glad to be alive, and a large part of that joy was connected to their work. Is there any other way to live? Would you want a mean old crouch working on you?
I guess it's the same with capturing photographs and forever freezing moments in time. The events in people's lives are those moments, and although it's not the same as operating on someone like a surgeon does, in many ways it is a responsibility that I feel just as passionately about. Every single person that steps in front of my camera, no matter if it's another wedding and the tenth one I photographed that month, or another couple celebrating their anniversary, or another screaming two year old, each and every person gets the same amount of passion because it is a part of who I am. It never changes. I love what I do, and I believe this not only helps me create more powerful images for others, but it also creates a more powerful experience for the those who are being photographed, while they are being photographed. The session itself is a positive experience. I've had folks come up to me time and time again and say things like: "Thanks, you're so relaxed and so much fun to work with. I can't wait to see the pictures."
I suppose if I ever stop loving doing what I'm doing it will be time to move on. I can't see that happening. I'm having too much fun and it keeps me young and energized. I love doing what I'm doing. If that fact never changes, nothing else will. I'm a people/portrait photographer and as long as I can put up with the occasional pangs of guilt for having so much fun doing what I'm doing, and getting paid for it, everything will be okay. And I can keep making bride's smile when they look at their finished wedding album. I often meet couples years after their wedding date and say hi to them in the mall or where ever. They tell me all about the album or their wedding DVD. How everyone seems to think that it's the only time they've ever seen such a unique collection of images that captures so much. And they always have a sparkle in their eyes when they share these little experiences.
A surgeon can often go back and reset a broken bone. A carpenter can re-cut and replace a botched job. A chef can start all over if he ruins his latest creation. I can't. Time moves on and the moments are a "flicker". I can't explain why I love to do something that carries so much responsibility. Some think it's the money, but it's not. I mean money helps, it pays the bills and I get to take my 10 year old to Disney Land if I plan well, but it's more than just money. There's something about a wedding day. There's something about taking pictures for a living. It all comes together and makes sense in the long run.
Thanks for reading my babbling.....Robert Provencher